I took my girlfriend to an improv show the other night and during intermission we were passionately arguing over whether half a 5 Hour Energy shot would give you 2.5 hours of energy or 5 hours of half-assed energy so we turned around to ask the opinions of the three people behind us and one of them said “Are all your arguments like this because we heard you in the lobby earlier fighting over the right way to pronounce ‘egg’?”
"Oh my god everyone says "like" too much the English language is dead."
I begeth thy pardon ser, but nay one marks thou.
Thou moveth thy mouth but none in thy presence couldst giveth two shits about thy w’rries about the natural changes in the English language. ‘tis not thy conc’rneth because, liketh, shuteth the hole on thy face whence thou sticketh the cake.
Language changes, like, get over it.